Lying in the grass, feeling the warm welcoming moistness below and watching shadows stretch in the late afternoon brightness. That earth is calling and I'm almost ready for its embrace. The past three months have been a blur, a pull of consciousness back into a state from which I thought I had been liberated. Evidently not so. As the context of my existence returns, so do all the former habits, along with the circular lethargy and ennui. Amongst all this, a few flashes of brightness followed by the narcotic haze of a pink dawn and a hangover.Why the angst? I have all I need and not recognising it is a misdemeanor for which I am obliged to pay the price.