The Vision Thing

I have come to the half-way mark - temporally and geographically. Five months behind me, five months ahead of me, and it´s the furthest to the West I will go this trip. Most significantly though, I hope that I have come half-way symbolically in the Jungian sense of the word.

Tourist is an ugly word. It conjures images of cameras, bumbags/fannypacks and crowds. At it´s worst, it´s the most socially acceptable form of voyeurism - a panoptical view into the existance of the Other - where each transaction is highly calculated and controlled. In exchange for capital, the package tourist is relieved of all concerns pertaining to their bodily needs and granted a license to reinforce his or her cultural stereotypes.

As much as I´d love to write myself out of that narrative, it is powerful through its very being. The convenience of not having to think, of having things come to you, is dreadfully seductive for someone as socially impaired and lazy as myself. The only solution is to reflect upon one´s failures, and to look up to the successes of others. Hence this entry on those who travel and/or blog better than I do.

First, there´s Brian: "Having quit my job and left my apartment, I left the U.S. (after one last binge of burgers and ice cream and movies)." That was in May 2002. I met Brian on the bus from Sofia (Bulgaria) to Skopje (Macedonia) - one of those rare incidents where I overcame my insecurities and started a conversation with a random stranger. It was certainly worth it.

I´d met Carl at Hostel Mostel the day before: "When are you getting up tomorrow? Please kick me in the head at 8 o´clock - I need to get the bus to Plovdiv." Thanks to Carl I went to Albania. His blog has been a treat since.

Then there´s Pat - a different kind of traveller: "The US - you love it or leave it." At around the age of 50, that is precisely what he did, moving for the second time to Japan. At the time I met him, he was one of the few people that made life at the pink bunny school of English bearable.

Finally, Col - one person who takes remarkable notice of what´s going on, and has a metaphor for everything. He tends to savour the places he goes, making the effort of living there when possible.

There are many others I could list. But the sum of their collective lesson seems to be twofold:

- Throw yourself into life, leaving your fear behind - don´t stand apart from it all.

- Make the effort to notice (and even note down) the details - from supermarket prices, to the rhythm of rain as it changes with the seasons - that is what makes existance beautiful and interesting.

Watching Der Himmel über Berlin (Wings of Desire) three years ago, I couldn´t empathise with Damiel, the angel who chooses to fall to earth. If there was an ideal state of being, then it would have been to float, observe, occasionally dipping in a hand to help. Now I can only regret how long it has taken me to pack my bags and begin to leave the Panopticon.